Sorry, but Every Day is NOT Mother’s Day

I’ll be honest – my husband wanted a child before I did. One particular Mother’s Day after we were married he joked with me that if I were a mom, then I would get to celebrate that day. He apparently didn’t consider being a mother to our fur baby, Bebe, reason enough for me to receive a gift. So when I gave birth to our daughter at the end of March in 2013, I reminded him of his promise to lavish me with attention when I became a mom.

“Yes, but you’re not MY mom,” he said.

Mother's Day when Charlotte was one

Mother’s Day when Charlotte was one.

I reminded him that actually I kind of was (who does your laundry and makes all your appointments?) and henceforth it was his job to make my Mother’s Day special.

Ladies, it’s every spouse’s job to make YOUR Mother’s Day amazing, especially when your children are young.

I don’t care if you labored for 8-hours or had a C-section, adopted or had your baby via a surrogate, if you are responsible for a tiny dictator (or two, three, even six, bless your heart) then you are a mom and you deserve to be celebrated. I don’t want to hear that “every day is Mother’s Day” excuse, because it’s not. Every day I do not get to sleep in and have mom-osas (as I call them) when I wake up and eat pancakes in bed uninterrupted. Not every Sunday am I taken out to brunch with chocolate fountains and receive cards and a Keurig coffee maker. I once taught a Mother’s Day class at a cycle studio where the woman’s husband dropped her off so she could take a spin session and I was horrified for the woman. She had no idea he was taking her there and this lady deserved to be dropped off at a spa, not left to take a free cycle/yoga class. Spouses – this is not OK to do. Ever. Personally I’d rather be dropped off at the liquor store with an unlimited credit card in hand than taken to a place where I’m reminded how good I don’t look when covered in sweat.

I’m a part-time working and part-time stay-at-home-mom. I spend my days cleaning my floors, folding laundry, flying the friendly skies, and teaching cycle and yoga classes. I clean up spills and cook lunches that never get eaten, I wrestle getting my toddler to come off the playground and I sacrifice my Netflix time so my daughter can nap quietly in my bed. I spend time putting together puzzles, coloring, making play dough zebras, painting nails, and watching Frozen. I didn’t give up drinking wine for 9-months, endure midwife appointments, drink glucose and have my blood drawn, and wear maternity shirts from Old Navy just so I could be treated the same way, day in and day out, every day of the year.

I’m a mom and I’ve sacrificed part of who I was to be who I am and I deserve to be acknowledged.

My mom's willing to fly out to babysit and hike with me, that makes her pretty awesome.

My mom’s willing to fly out to babysit and hike with me. That makes her pretty awesome.

When you become a mom you realize just how much your mom needs to be appreciated, as well. If you have friends who are single moms, then it’s your job to do something special for them. As women we need to uplift one another and we also need to remind our significant others and our friend’s significant others that they need to do their part to honor us. Raising a child is no easy task so let’s give credit to those who are trying the best they can to be the best mom they can be so their children never go without.

Sure, as your children become adults, it’s their job to go the extra mile for you this special Sunday. I believe that your significant other, however, should always lead by example. If your child sees you being cared for, honored, and extra loved on Mother’s Day, then he or she will also take the time to appreciate you. I know my mom and I don’t always see eye to eye, but I wouldn’t be the person I am today without her. After my grandfather died, my mother always made sure my grandmother was taken to lunch, given flowers, and celebrated each Mother’s Day. This left a legacy for me to follow, because I saw how much joy it brought not only my grandmother, but my mom, as well.

My friend Mallory and I celebrating Mother's Day together last year.

My friend Mallory and I celebrating Mother’s Day together last year.

I know I’m not my husband’s mom, but I’m the mother to his child and I made his dreams of becoming a father come true. I don’t think I’m lucky that he spoils me on Mother’s Day, because that’s his role as my husband. So to all the significant others out there reading this, know it’s your job to make your spouse’s day special this Mother’s Day. To all the mother’s, please don’t count yourself as blessed or lucky, count yourself as worthy of celebration for all you do today and every day.

Enjoy your mom-osas.

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